Carlton Halpert

Sally Bancroft-Wax is employed by Halpert Life Sciences at their Antarctic Cloning facility where she works as junior penguin liaison. For the first several years of our professional acquaintance I only saw her via web-cam and videophone. I was surprised to learn, upon meeting her in person, that she really is that low resolution and only says each third word clearly.

Bancroft-Wax is her original name and it is a pure coincidence that she met and married Adam Wax Bancroft. Her original intent was to hyphenate her name but we couldn’t afford the extra large business cards that would be needed to include “Sally Bancroft-Wax-Wax-Bancroft”.

Sally’s researches on behalf of Halpert Life Sciences include:

Penguin Flight School - This project, while promising on paper proved to be harder to implement in practice. None who saw it will forget the Adele Trebuchet (By which I refer to the penguin catapult, not the poet of the same name).

Breeding A Negative - There is work still to be done here, but the intention is to breed a penguin that is black-bellied and white-backed. There was a really good reason that we wanted to do this, but for the life of me I can’t remember what it was.

Bancroft-Wax is a frequent contributor to the speculative marine biology project of the Halpert Institute for Deep Sea Shenanigans.